Trials & Tribulations of Middle Aged Dating
I’m not a fan of dating. I think over the years I have had little to be happy about when it comes to dating. A lot of people assume that (because of my job) meeting people would be easy. Well, it hasn’t been.
Partly, it’s because we are not “out and about” as much as people think. My average day is 8 hours in a studio. Most days I only see two co-workers. It’s a bit of an isolating thing. It can really get to you if you let it.
My divorce would probably go down in history as one of the most cantankerous and brutal battles ever to be waged.
Unfortunately, it has played a part in my current dating woes. I’m very guarded having made a vow to myself that I would never “settle” for anything that didn’t really “speak” to me. Despite that, over the past 10 years of being relatively single – a few ladies have entered my life that I was excited about.
These ladies didn’t work out for several reasons, but a common thread seems to be about being honest and realistic. The older you get….the more you realize you have less patience for the “red flags” and can easily walk away. Especially, if you have been through a lot of the things I have been through.
I have an odd blend of “not going to settle” and “really wanting to be in a relationship”. One will balance out the other. However, “not settling” seems to be winning these days.
I try hard to make sure each time one of my prospects disappoints me, that I don’t become that much more disheartened. It’s clear to me that in today’s world of anonymity and “swiping right” you don’t get an easy way to “get to know” someone so “matching” with as many people as possible is the goal.
So, in theory, to be successful at dating means that you are having multiple conversations with multiple people to try and find the “cream of the crop”.
That’s my issue. I’m a one person at a time sort of person, so I tend to invest a lot of time early on. This hasn’t worked out so well….but I really can’t change that. So, I remain optimistic. Luckily, I’m old enough now to not “need” to have a companion….I “want” one and I want the one that I believe I deserve.
So, it might take a little longer for “middle aged” folks to find happiness. I’m optimistic that it will happen yet I remain worried that I’m running out of time. ~ Parker